Thursday, January 7, 2010

The Winter Olympics are More Fun than a Torture Investigation

Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper is under fire for proroguing Parliament until after the 2010 Winter Olympics. His detractors accuse him of undermining democracy and running away from his problems, the biggest of which was the investigation into whether Canada knowingly handed Afghan detainees over to be tortured by awful men. Thanks to the prorogation of Parliament, that investigation is now dead.

Now, before anyone gets too worked up, let me ask a simple question. What looks like more fun?


Or this?

Would you rather spend your day with these guys?

Or these guys?

I thought so.

Let's face it: investigations and "human rights tribunals" are one-way tickets to Yawnsville. Who wants to sit in a stuffy room with nerdy diplomats, lawyers and soldiers when they could be hitting the slopes, playing hockey or having homoerotic fun doing God-knows-what with some outrageous old rascals?

The truth is, winter sports are fun in a way that torture investigations can only dream of. I say congratulations to Stephen Harper for bowing down to Old Man Winter and saying, "I am in love with you."

* An interesting fact: the Nuremberg Trials were paused several times so that everyone -- Nazi and Jew alike -- could cheer on the West German curling team.

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